Sunday Afternoon (column)
Published in InZicht, may 2013
2:29pm says the clock on the side table next to me. Sunday afternoon, just created a mix of a twofold blues in which my friend Erik played one of his best trumpet parts ever. A lot of hassle getting such a mix right, especially with such a long track in which really a lot happens and which actually also contains two completely different songs. Played a little darts in the meantime, which went very well today, for my level that is, nothing compared to Taylor, van Barneveld, Wade or Van Gerwen obviously, nevertheless, sometimes time flies. Nice.
Do you recognise the aspect that memories of events and memories of dreams have the same illusory character? That everything your spirit ‘recollects’ is indemonstrable, arbitrary and coloured? What is real? Can you be certain for the full 100%?
One day Wei Wu Wei wrote: ‘Why are you unhappy?” Because 99,9% of what you think and do is about YOU. And there isn’t one. Indeed there isn’t.
Above it says: … ‘on the side table next to me’. Me. Referring to what? This body of course, because to the Nameless no such thing exists as next to, or in front of, or behind.
Yesterday there was a Satsang here downstairs, (again perceived from the body). During that as well the impossibility to say something really meaningful, showed. Every metaphor fails. Every pointer actually misses the point, if it’s taken too literally. Satsang ‘happens’ (or not), but nobody ‘does’ that. Vague reasoning: live every moment to the fullest (like there is a succession of separate moments and a ‘someone’ that can decide to be fully present or not. Everyone is consciousness (like there are various separate beings). All is one (like ‘all’ and ‘one’ don’t already exclude one another). Sigh.
Miraculous. Simultaneity. The spontaneous full awareness of THIS-NOW-HERE and seemingly events, sounds, sensations, typing, painful shoulder.
This-now-here IS; no time, development, process, evolution. That’s all dualistic mind play. As such there are people that think there is an evolution going on, a movement towards a collective awakening…. Sigh again; awakening is not the outcome of a process. It is the destruction of the dream image. Suddenly there is being-awake. It is the time bound thinking that believes in processes. There is no process, no improvement or development, only radiant emptiness that IS. Timeless, unborn, immortal, not locatable, independent, impartial, impersonal.
Enlightenment is impersonal. Persons are time and space bound fata morganas. What a fata morgana ‘does’ serves no relevance to and has no influence on reality. It is not the fata morgana that awakens (by making efforts or whatever), the fata morgana suddenly gets seen for what it is: a mirage. It always was, so whether it is seen or not does not change a thing about it. Whether a fata morgana believes in fata morganas does not matter, they simply don’t exist.
And just to be clear, there is no ‘someone’ that suddenly sees that ‘you’ are a fata morgana. Nor is there someone that is currently writing this text or someone reading it. It just appears that way. Me and you is fine in daily practice, but the realisation can occur all this me and you stuff is actually nonsense. Nobody here, nobody there. Nothing happens. Holiday. Everything is holiday. ‘I’ do not go anywhere, come from nowhere, don’t have to succeed, confirm, achieve or avoid anything. Not even ‘don’t have to’: It’s not possible. There is nothing.
The dream occurs, like the soap shows on TV: pixels, Nobody there. If it is felt or thought to be somebody, many paths are possible. Hundreds of techniques, systems, philosophies, religions, books, workshops, drugs, stuff, achievements, relationships etcetera. All o.k. There is nothing wrong with that. Fata morganas. Empty.
In reality nothing is more important than anything else, nothing is more or less valuable than anything else. But the thinking is double natured, so you believe in the good and the bad, in more and less, in desirable and undesirable and all that stuff. Great, it’s all fine: but is does not bring anything (except drama and conflict – and apparently, ‘you’ like that).
Game: Just check for a week or so, if not all your little problems start with an ‘I’ concept and the judgement followed by that of something positive or negative. Don’t immediately say ‘Yes, that is the case’. Just play it once or twice, if only for a week. And try to examine what would happen if you would not have an opinion about things, if you would not interpret anything as pleasant or painful, if you would just stick to the facts. Purely facts. For example. Your car window is smashed, CD player is stolen. Facts: broken window, CD player is gone. It is what it is. The fuss that arises in you is an addition of the spirit, time, past, judgements, assumptions, ‘I’ concept, mine-yours, values and beliefs …. Fata morgana … right? Enjoy.
Text Hans Laurentius; Translation by Mark Volmerink